A gentleman called the office a few weeks ago and was looking for an email address. While looking for the information he says to me, "I think I remember who you are, you work in the back right?" To which I replied, "No, I'm the little goth girl that works out front." And of course he says, "Hey! Yeah, I do know who you are."
Then, a few nights later, my fourteen year old daughter was complaining that one of her teachers dresses like a teenager. I said 'Well, I dress like a goth,' and she replies 'Yeah mom, but goth is normal, she's just dressing weird.'
Wow... I managed to floor even myself by describing myself that way... twice. It may not be the image I see of myself, but it is the image others see of me. People do not have the ability to see anything but the outside and a lot of time I have to answer questions as to whether or not I'm a pagan. Ugh......
However, there is one individual that sees straight into the heart of my very soul, that I can never sell out for, and that of course is God.
Matthew 15:8 quotes from Isaiah, saying, ‘This people honors me with their lips, but their heart is far from me;' I can praise God to everyone around me, but if I don't keep my heart set on Him and His love, then I am set apart from Him.
David asked God in Psalm 26:1-2 "Prove me, O Lord, and try me; test my heart and my mind. For your steadfast love is before my eyes, and I walk in your faithfulness." We should also be asking God to test our hearts and minds continually to make sure we are following after Him.
God desires for my heart to love Him above all and Christ tells his followers (including me) in Luke 26:27 “You
shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul
and with all your strength and with all your mind, and your neighbor as yourself.”
"Love them with the love of Jesus" is what I tell myself constantly. I might see very crusty exteriors on the people I deal with, but God sees their heart and mine. He knows the thoughts I think about them whether they be good or bad. It drives me crazy when people judge me by my exterior and not the interior of my heart; so why am I doing that to other people?
The only way to change that, is to change the way you treat people and to make sure that at every point in the day you are loving with the love of Jesus. And maybe by doing this, instead of people describing me with the "G" word Goth, or describing me as "the lady with short, black hair that dresses in vampire clothes," they'll say 'That's the girl, the girl after God's own heart."
